I feel like telling you about a few of the songs, that makes me feel like you're always with me. First of all I'm gonna start with Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. The title says it quite clear, I think. But I means also when you were on earth, it felt like you were protecting me all the time.
"When I see your smile
Tears run down my face
I can't replace"
Whenever I look at the only picture I have left of you, tears do appear. I'm not sure whether it's because you're so beautiful or if it's because you're not in my presence anymore.
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold
And breaks through my soul
And I know, I'll find deep inside me
I can be the one
From the day you left earth, things started to go downhill. It seemed like nothing was worth it. Several times I've considered running away or even better come to you. But deep inside I've always found the strength to stay.
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
This was our promise to each other. Maybe not the exact words. But this was definitely what we both needed and promised. I don't know if I held my promise right, but you for sure have. I have been lonely at nights, but deep down I've always known I could write to you. I really wish I could be there for you, the same way you're here for me. But sadly if that was to happen, it'd be quite tragic.
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven
It's okay, it's okay, it's okay
You saved me for so long, and I thought I had saved you. Because that's what words said, but sadly not what reality wanted. You're still saving me, but now from heaven. It took me long to accept. First it was anger. My anger was reasonable. I had just got used to things being fine. I never thought you leaving me was an opportunity. It never hit me that heartbreak and illnesses aren't the only way to lose someone you love, until that night. Then it was misery, guilt, jealousy and so one feeling continued until I felt nothing one day. No feelings at all. That's when I finally started to accept that you were gone.
Seasons are changing and waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you, I'll be the one
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven
Time has never stood still. It never will for anybody. The whole world is not gonna stop just to pity you because of your loss. No one is gonna bring you lost loved ones back to life just because you're hurt. So your only choice is to accept and move on with your own life.
'Cause you're my, you're my, my-y-y-y
My true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
'Cause I'm here for you
Please don't walk away
And please tell me, you'll stay, stay
I'm so glad to know you're always there for me. I actually feel sorry for people who didn't know you. It's such a shame. You could've brought something completely special to their existence. But on the other side I wouldn't have been able to share you with anyone. One thing about me, that most people deny when they talk about their own qualities, is that I'm extremely possessive. You were mine and mine only. Which could've been what put me and your sister in bad situations quite often. Because you were the only one she found happiness in, but you were also the one I found happiness in.
Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know, I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to Heaven
