Dear Alex,
R wasn't at school today, he had a day off. When I got home the first things my parents asked was "Why do you look so sad? Wasn't R at school". First of all I wouldn't say I looked sad, it's just my face. Second, since when did my parents start noticing what I care about and how I am. I guess it's the right way to go. They've started understanding a bit.

So we did some of the work for the project, and sent R a lot of stuff to read and re-write. We are great friends, aren't we? Making him read and re-write stuff that we don't even need. Excited to see his work tomorrow aha. I learnt making those paper wish stars today. So proud of me. Then I decided to make a star for every single person I love 100% , trust and care about. Surprisingly, I could only make 4 stars.

I kinda hate myself for not loving more people truly, but that's just how I am. I think I'm finally getting more comfortable being around R when others are there too. That's great.

I know I talk and think about R & J a lot. But those people are my only reasons to be here. It's nice to know that I mean a lot to J too. J and I talked a lot about life today. How wierd it's gonna be when R moves school, and then the next year we're all in different schools. I hope J and I are still friends. I'm not sure about R. I wish we will stay friends, but I'm not getting my hopes up. Because he's moving twice. He'll get new better friends. But a little piece of my heart is still hoping for one of the magical friendship. Like you know in movies? Where the group of friends meet up like very year same place, same date, same time.

Anyways, J is thinking about a bit style change. She said she got inspired by your style. Finally I've been waiting for someone to change their styles completely. She wants to get her hair layered and then dye it black. She's in love with the whole "Skater"-thing. Like I used to be. I really hope she changes her style. Nothing wrong with the current one, but a change doesn't hurt. Her dad will maybe let her. I wish I could do the same. But my parents want me to be "normal".

We're ordering some fake liprings soon. Then we'll try some black washout dye. If it all works together. Perfect! :D

-A